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The Neapolitan. (Naples, N.Y.) 1879-1884, March 30, 1882, Image 1

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Oo » rnoh Tw o taahe TT*hjr«« laohon J?»x»x- Is Tw o inoh«r-*. Thr»e inrhc* Four inch«* Tbrc« Inchon Fouz Inchot F=\o r Two ook.»_ 9 75 | Quarter Co* oo 1 >o _ SO 2 OO 2 SO Toinl Cotamo Plalf Column fcrtor Colt | TTxlj-xi Ooln ™ I Kair Co Jam Whol© Oolai T*wo ioch*-s Four ixicfao» Ono inch Two incho** Tn.r*\«' lnriM» Four InchM For- F\o-*Jr> 'Krr^^lKjm t l &0 1 Qonit«r Colamr S OO 1 Thlrrt Column . . 3 OO I Etrvir Column •\ OO 1 Wliolo Colomn . . . F~o T - T~w o Montha QaHrtcr Culatnn. ; Third Golunwu 1 H&lf Column- I TVholc ColTimn Por Tl-* re o Mont»-*n *2 SO I Quivrter Colomn.- 3 .*M> I T hLr-d Column 4 SO 1 HMlf Column. « OO | Wbole Col«mn OO OO e oo 8 OO . 12 crO * O OO 7 *0 9 OO 1G OO . W OO IS OO .13 OO ^ rro««'o A Court .Ice In ncrel)r »rl v ,_ _ _Llr>at Jamen O or- don . i.*tV^< ib'i\ town of Nn»l«-n. 1« \\id counlT. ^ ST^tWnnarwlj*C<1 prut of th e Bdmt.»l«'.rai»r». at nla «%o«ln mm\<3 loVn of .NapUs. oo or before tbo30to dajr of April. 18W. Da, t rd, K»pU«. Oct. 13, LEO ? I>ONT> J J It I H rou haro dJn<*aj^e of t*v dleo. willow il>ln. liver nj> - ' -* Ic Hv*»r o r d \ <*7?rrp*-W* JaJin- t» dirseln«--s«. palpUntlon , o f appotlic , et c pitln'ln aide or Rhoaido J>Tt. ^* II It si ]>I -S'- PECII'-IC IAVER o rl^jo .^rrarU If yo u t»R «D 1 VRV <1 i>r . daxt ncdli an y aiM«a»c «if : ml*> nlftoU*. ten ,-*«- obju; ih* url F\0 On« In oik Two inchir* Thrc« i_nohor» • Six Months. 4 OO I Qanrtor Column « OO I Third Column I BOilf Column I Whole Oolumj* IS oo 13 OO 30 OO 35 OO Ono inch Tw o lnaliea Three ineh«*« ^onr lncbov ..•IS OO • 5 OO 35 OO . CO OO % 6 OO ( Uunrter Colutai H OO 1 Third Column lO OO | HiUrColumn . . . IS OO I Wholo Column The aboTti raL«n nro »ery low, r+xxA nr« fairly pro- portioned, comidorlng wot-It and np«cc. They will O* cXo**oly adbcrcd to in every oaso. Bu»inom I OOA I B WO nmfonaly a oonta par lmc, and «ao inacrllon lc«n than 26 cent« I^irg« advenuera will have rfttflB rvooording- to amount done A-dvortiflemoQte rhanged monthly IX doalrt^. Soltlemont roqnircd qnurt«rl7 ^• r l«ffal noti«« , natxiafiMitory tcr « M con -i*e made a* tb« offlco or t>y RU U. MamogQ and duath nvtloe*, frx-c. Dr. Abniare\ Seven Barks .LII J bisrvnu will «tire you tr yon sor« tlirottt, dipnt neri* morr>««. pain in »t«uim bruUra fibllblnlDH, » to Dr. A \brains Liniment Try It Sold by U UI-RUI I and all drujt Mr WUliam W Chadvlck. of BatohvilV. Cobo., { wiitos QDdor date of Jane 14. lSSO. t o Dr. Kennedy, 1 to nay that trie use of * \E«oc e-dy * B Fa T O rite Rome- 1 dy baa cnrixl lilui of Oall Btobe. ' 1 from which h« bad e i j.crlmrcil cTfry t fci in t£ bat. comfort for a long Um\ 3fr Ohadwlclc fo't wholly c a d n 1»MII ha wrftLB. M ^<1 * I bar» had no pain for alx month\ and ha.ro also rofEalned my Qeah and can f lar.d n fair cloy * work I rooommend 'ICrrtnodj-' Fuvorlio JlCTxiudy' to any one snOerlag from a de- raDRod llv«?r. '• Oratrful patienta are c mm on Or. R^nnixiy It* tinlly lo recelpt of IctUin frofb then*. «x- p.«: h 'lng »lmili»r N-QtlmunU. Thouc lotiors are apon- tantyjn? and put lo all Tarleclr s or phranenlorj, hot invarlftbiy sctiloft forth one tbtns—ihe ralue oa\ * Ktiincdy'ii Fnvoiite Eoirtcdy\ for naany forms of U • «caRo 1 c inr»y >.«» luat tlio thing you bar* been ' tooklc ; for . I » yon r LI rer dlaordertfl p B KT -« yon Drronpenient of the Kidneys or Bladder, avaoclatad k i c\-ith Con«tl[>«ilon af the Bowel*? If to , you Want j * K:nr.«x 1 y & Fnrorlto Remedy. * I>r. Kannedy [>rnctl»:i;^ Medicine.- iva.d Snraory lo all their branehoi. r 1 1 «- n.o(l «i»t« >our ooso franlcly. I^ttora prompt — . 1 y unswcifrt Addn-iu \t>r. XXvrld fCannedy, Bon- •.lout M. V '-t>r. Kcnnody Fsv*rlt« Kemsdy' ' for saio by u 11 druprfciiit». iSznl Thtnt or itometbtnjt «rlt=d to do. Kev«r mind If It Is amall; Little thlnca are lo#t to new , How Ood e>«e» and ble ••€« nil. Violet* are wee. mod eat flower a. Bldlua: in their bcd» of tr«<n. Bat their pel fume Clla the bowers. Though they acaresly oao be evaei Pratty hTuahelle of the Kro'« XMh their err a co m l bloom we lore, ii they bloatom round onr feet;. Bo do little ad.*, we find. Wblc-h at flret we oanuvt ece. I^ee-r* tbc Crajcrance, pure, behind. Of abtdloax ohailty. — Chlca(to A .<1 Tftnc* Town Officers. [ Levi O. Tlir 31.\ Bnperrtftor- K A Gri^wold. Tow n Clurlc — A W Dunton J uatiofi — I>- H Dunton. C. Spmgne. I M Lyon. Bighway Comnugmoner — Henry it . A JISCHHO ™ — Irtixnc Goundxy, muQ French O-reraef-r of Poor- fi«th I 'almitPr. . Inupectora of Klcctlon-Joan MagTcevy, Arnold, A O. Boamsns. Collector—J. A Lo-win. ConaUvhlee-J. A . I^^.Wm. 8. Johnwrn, Goo Sotiwinglc, Ooor^e^SwV(iJt^._ Oaxne Conatable' \ K XCIA C Commlaaioncra — B. John Elnrl. Thornton Tl nrrV ^. B M- Lea, BUSINESS CARDS. C AN AND AIGUA AND MARBLE WORKS. GOLD Great Thos e o f ..o n al° (rood J- O O IV I IS, MONUMENTAL CULPlORS AND DES1GNKR. money. __,.. _kdvantaere irood chances for making _ y thnt are olferoA, eenerally bccoino wealthv, w11 1 lo those who do ne t ImproVa Bticti cliaacoH remivln in poverty. Wo -want : maaj me\. vromen, boys and. jrlrlf* to work, for UB rtRlit In th.-lr own loc&lltloa. Any one eaa -Ola the woru prniH-rly from the tins* atart. Th« baslneM will pay tnor.- than ten tlmea- ordinary Tr»Be«. Kx- pMislvo outftt furnlnhed froe. No ona whoene:»fr*ei r„ 1 1H to imikr money rapidly. Ton c*±n derote-youx whole tl»*o to the work, or only your «P »ra mo- nu-ntH. F*nll Inforuintlonaad all that la needed eent rrc>'. AddresM S II >'80 N A Co . Portland afe. Slyl A BBOEEK EKGAGEMEN T. WhoM Mary Clarimonfa cngugc- aeot was proclaimed t o tlio world, HARNESSES, noathe 1 will Monnaents, MaatJe-Piece and Grates Comolete. Grave Stones, Mural Tablets, Furni­ ture Tops, <fee., lyl Sell Harnesses Cheaper! Vou may e«fleet from a LAHGEE AND BETTER STOCK tlinn you can find elsowhere. W. L. SPRAGUE, V. w. BEERS. W. \W. KUN8EL U BEERS &MUNSELL Strobridge Waslier le the heart machine In the market, and to an Improve- n ent on the * 'gjcpreee Wmanor and has t »>« oolabrated B.OCKISO B.UBB1NG BOARD. lit m i • I U M. olotlMf s i . cbMi ^ <x*±tf part <>y tjiv I .1M tn«k< > tin (1 r^rxilr ROCK BOTTOM. 1 ha^o Ttwt rc<H.>trwd a V»rx* s4oolc of 'FALL & WINTER GOODS a« ns yr vtom In I M I V H O J\.w and can arl-ee bsnraina that wUl HO SMO' ull who vrlll c-a^l. I IT 111 r\ Gaca stoga Boot for $2.20 Carriages and Wagons atpr»o«*a/tc I i n f o compet e ttrttft- an-y other mh.ojy I am also aerent for all kluds of orat-olaie CAR.R.IAGK & BUGG Y SPOKES at the W\eld Pactory on Vine Street Produce Taken in Exchange ^ n Work \W \«.x-i-ga <a. ? Vactorj on Vin« Mrcct, rs a r* I e N . V . (Jic2<sr \s i rie.r/r_x r J\*r JO eta, <//JI£O I/ . I omt>)oy n o nn worK , an d Q unlit y Look lOb hu t men of experience, to do my no t be undTKol d by nny *hop, •ork and utoci: considered. -tlx «3 Goods 1 4317\ 431\ ~W K U . H U MM. L.VWR'KT, RIlddle»«x. JTJS'JF RECEIVED ! a iceucral stock o4T epleodld old reliable and long oatabllaheel JEWELRY STORE EOGEES <& BRO.'S Triple-Plated Knives, &c. ot prlcoB as low aa-11»o lowest m . tr ft enecHalty or Boots and Sheoe that quaUvanUohfapneM emnoot be beaten 3 fox O A JL, I boa \» to* S oante OOES Geo. 83tf W. Strol»rid .ge. ; r» —\Wo continu e t o muk c WAT CI 1 REPAIRING 2 j In ix* 1 it* branrhen a ec-eelalty. m>. •K»ms<'»t SON. GROCERY A HEED SUPPLIED. ~W ARIETY 1 hav e ntttrd ' i 1ix -»t-eJttss RESTAURANT Our m^eoTc of Choice Family Groceries ple-tre. and oh' \ the ch< old* the Fot .peet. i t receive d I wish to Inform the public tlint 1 ka a new lot of 5 and lO cent Goods. S5> vo from SO to '-'OO por c* goods. nt b y buyliiK i *^ 5^. ^ u ty 1<\ an d by measure. • all tt*d^ «^<» ^Toat' specialty. —x*A m y w*c 1 °\** aa k a trial and. a « Juoe »a\» r,—viny the ir«n« them afa e-^ej ..-jjoe to prove that It wilt p»y to call on mo. mm m in «achinf<i for scoe-de. .Ml Italy HeUow. FRESH ARBIYA.L TZJ HE?, Every Article Warranted to he a Renulne bcu-caln and of cOod Intrinsic \ A I II O and In e-r-ery—day use b y e-v cry family 1 al^t> kf*p constantly on suto u full lino of Groceries & Provisiocs, Lamps & Fixtures, GJoves & Miiteiis, Pajer Goilas, Nations, Etc., GMC8 G^ars Tctiaccos, Pipes. CRACKERS, BOLOGNA CIGARS, TOBACCO, SARDINES Etc., Etc. FS1E S XX \MEN T S o f al l kind s da y an d nl«h t Call on HANK.\ H. F. TYLER n rj TZJ El ftET THE BEST t by the mea A. M- WOOD, O J* F O S J T I O JST the life of business. EVERY WEEK T AT SttURBIN'S iTuirrJbiture Warerooms. UNDERTAKING , £n aQ Ita branchea. _ *Tba3I e?n J . B . SEttJaBXH. . »®»ea ?m X u n now prepared to pell to responsible pari 1 c»>. ORGANS, PIANOS, Sewing IVLicHines, - acd Eoode In the Une. of the at tke lowest Possible Prices. LEAP ALL OTHERS! Every Style & Price. OPERATION. FfiOWoMV. 3URABILITY CMMl WORKM a.aj«mf». tellable. _ _ e - t word at 1— ' xx »e41. yo a n h a nr»t- ». 3>£M£ilS WOOD. POPULAR EVERYWHERE. IT SsaXo In Eiauy C2ttrw amd *X«—• «3&o TTittt «Ki States. A KD BY JORDAN BROrHERS, 3eTeSt—A.p%~!• j -Sty^ tlicre was n gcnoral expression of sur- pi'lHO. People generally are surpvise<3 rtt matrimonial ongagt-mfnts. There is al ways some cogent reason wb y things aliorjKi have been at3 juste cl otherwise wliy Jolin slioultl have married Jonu, and Pete r should pre­ fer Betsey. No\boJy ever yet wns married to snit everybody . Ba t in Wary Claiirnont's caao it did really seem as if tlie course of true love ha d interfered seriously with th e current of common sense and prudence. ISliss C1 arimont was only one-and- twenty, a tall, imperial \beauty with dewy black eyes, a skin as fresh as damask: roses, and dark brown hair, coiled in shining bands a t th e back of he r head. Moreover, Miss Clari­ mont had a \career \ before her. Sh e had j ust graduated from Uedfield Medical University, an d taken ou t her diploma as an M . X>. \An d only, t o think of it, \ said Aun t Jo , bursting into tears of vex­ ation and disappointment, \that she must needs go and rain all her pros­ pects by jjettingj engaged t o Ilarr y Marlow, down In N\ew York.\ \I t does seem strange, Aun t Jo , when X sit <lowo an d think of it, \ B«i d ~X>o^-t^r~^Ttf stryV ^lairghuog^ . -*MI<1 blushing. \Six months ago, my pro­ fession was all th e world t o me- X neither cared or wished for anything outside its limits. Th e future was all mapped ou t before me , without let or hindrance; and now \ \Hump h 1\ growled Aun t Jo . \An y br&inless idiot can got married, and keep a man's house an d mend his shirts for him, bu t you were made for something higher and more dig­ nified, Mary.\ Mary's dew-bright eyes sparkled. *'IIigher, A ant Jo ?** said she. \M.ore dignified ? There yo u ar e mistaken. There is no higher or more dignified lot in life than tha t of the true loving wife of a noble hus­ band.\ \Fiddlesticks said Aun t Jo . \A s if every poor fool who was daz­ zled b y th e glitter of a wedding ring didn't say tho same thing 1 You've disappointed me , Mary Clariraont, and I'm ashamed of you, and that the long and tho short of it.\ Alary smiled. \Dea r Aunt Jo,\ said she, \ 1 shall not let my sword and shield rust, be lieve me. Harr y has his own talents to advance him in th e world, and i t will be a t least if year before we ar e to marry. I n th e mean time, I shal accept th e post of visiting physician to th e Aldenbar y Almshouse, and practice my profession in Aldenbary just th e same as if there were no en­ gagement \I wish to goodness there wasn't,\ said Aun t Jo. \ I tell you what, Mary, I don't fancy that smiling, smooth-tongued young man of yourp, and I never shall.\ Still Doctor Mary Clarimont kept her temper. \ I am sorry Aun t Jo,'\ she said, pleasantly. \Bu t I hope tha t you will eventually change your mind.\ \ I used t o keep a thread-and nee­ dle store when I was a young wom­ an,\ remarked Aun t Jo , drily, \an d I could always tell th e ring of- a coun­ terfeit half-dollar when a customer laid it on th e counter. I could then, ajad I can now and I tell you what, there's base metal about Harr y Mar- low !\ Mary bit her lips. \Perhaps . We will no t discuss the subject further, Aun t Jo,\ sh© said, with quiet dignity, and th e old lady said no moro \Aun t Jo is wron g I\ persisted th e pretty young M. X>. to herself \Mary is making a fool of herself I\ though t Aunt Jo . Aldenbury was a pretty manufac­ turing village, with a main street shaded b y umbrageous maples, a \went end,\ where p**ople who ha d made their fortunes lived comforia* bly in rot>my old horjKe e KQrronnde d bv velvet lawHR an d terraced gar­ dens, an d an \east- end,** .where peo- pl* fought desperately, an d no t atl- itV My 4h <4>0 bettle r way:* success body togeth tance. And a littl the aim by a certain whose consci during his la stone gables picturesque 1 sc.npe. Doctor something o bnrv. U p t dent M. !>.'* tlern en ones, with o A bcautpf prescri ptiom and potions, town, and bio one. idea, since sol ves \that I ly u rid erst I tients. And the almshouse } ry, and list sound of he blue gravel portico. I t was a when the y| the neatly drawing o to entering^ again, wh white-cappj respecting mat ism, w \Oh I Vf OlariinontJ forgot th e -The no Doctor Mi Tha t i ningham, ' a quiet quite bad] you'd go. She •ion-frona clergy m£ ors, .you W cent body] So Doc into the 1: its white ing eh aii ment., wh eled-up Wi shawl. She loc: ry came ii of her ca \I'm a and I'm f troubl Lord doi ko to \This Cunning Tho li up to m Mary m< \Wha pleasant \Loui \Marl name, is coloi i ng| \We'i old won her aptl us in th| in th e might \ A s ham, \a \^STot the old plain, a fine, any pri he cou himself] lilce m< Vet bin if I am see m<fe asth ed in i| course for a Harr y ting; r«^ So X aske;d place ce*uljd he ga| some pensee^ am . |e way out of tho village, built *• and endowed [smuggling soa captain, enco. -had pricked him tte r days, raised its gray to th e sky, and made a >nckjr rou n<l t o the land - ary Clarimont made f a sensation at Alden- > this time, all th e resi- liad been stnffy old gen - wigs, or port young ye-glasses. 1 young lady, who wrote mid com pounded pills was a no\ elty in th e no mcaii H a disagreca- Pcople latiior liked tlie ey had convinced them - (the lady doctor thorough- d hersel f and her pa- pooi old people a t th e ^rew to love Doctor Ma- |en with eager ears for th e • carriage wheels over the drive which led up t o the Mafy etly color more \I s low ?' fully. \Y th e • whi t o do court brillian-t December day oun2 ph ysician stood in carpeted reception-room I her fur gloves, previous her neat phaeton once lo she reiterated t o th e ed maid some directions old An n Mudgett's rheu- len the matron hurried in. eg your pardon, Doctor \ Rhe said, \bu t I clean new old woman !\ w old woman !\ repeated iry, with a smile, s,\ exclaimed M rs. Oun- \sho only came last night old soul, half blind and with asthma. Perhaps just see her before you rought a card of admiss MortoiJ j -the- -!N «*»a.-^orlt. I, who is one of our direct- now. An d she Beems a de enough.\ tor Mary went cheerfully ttle brick-paved room, with (pallet-bed, cushioned rock and neatly draped case- ire sat a poor, little shriv oman, wrapped in a faded Mary, taking a photograph from her pocket. Th e old woman, with trembling hands, fitted on her iron-bowed spec­ tacles, and looked a t th e picture, ut­ tering a littlo cry of recognitien. \Sure 'miss, it's his own self,\ she cried. ** You're acquainted with him , then ?\ \Somewhat said Doctor Mary, composedly, as sho returned th e pho­ tograph t o its place. **And now I will leave yon something t o relieve this difficulty^ in breathing.\ But tlio old crone eyed her wist fully. \Perhap s you know th e yonng la dy my son is to marry ?\ \Y PS,\ said Doctor Mary, writing something in lior prescription book. • * I have seen her. \ \Perhaps inias,,' said th e old wom­ an, \yo u would give her my humble duty, and tell her I would just like to look a t her for ony© and see what she is like. There is no fear of rny troubling her, miss, for I mean t o end my days here. 13ut I would like to see he r juPt once. An d if it wouldn't -be asking too much, miss, would you please write t o m y son, and tell him where I am ? for I' m no scholar myself, and Pm his mo­ ther, after all.\ I will write t o him,\ said Doctor Mary, quietly ; and so she went away. \ I never see a lady doctor afore,\ said old Mrs. Marlow, with a long sigh. \Bu t she is a pretty creature, and it Non-nnion inen Bachelors. The place for hungry people Th e young man ; to enor- bridal trip around. seems <jood t o have he r I hope she'll come again soon. \You said the imidly, -a=* Dr . Ma­ in do v th e borlcr s Iced up n, from IP- . ., ., poor body, miss,' said sensible I'm making a in th e world, t take ns, miss, But .* hen she, deal the we'd said Mrs. is th e doctor,\ t > am . tic woman would have ako a courtesy, bu t Doctor >tioned her t o keep her scat, t is your name V ' said si |iy- pe Marlow, miss.\ ow ? Tha t is an unusual i\t it r\ said Alary Clarimont in spite of herself, e Knglish, miss,\ said th e lan, struggling brlively with »ma. \There ain't many of is country . I've a son, miss, law business, as r any mother ! proud of.\ on!\ echoed M rs. Cunning- nd you in th e almshouse I\ tha t it' s his fault, ma'am,\ creature made haste to ex- \My son is to bo married t o proud young lady as is for noe in th e land, and of course Id n't be expected t o bu rden with a helpless old woman ?. H e says I'm to write and L know how I ge t along, and siclc, or anything, he'll tr y t o I sewed carpets until th e , got hold of me, and support self comfortably. Bu t of I could not lay up anything •ainy day who could ? An d couldn't help rne, for he's ge t ady t o b e married, poor lad ! (went t o Doctor Merton and him did he know of a decent vhero an old woman like m e end her days in peace. .And ; -a. card t o come here, and ijnoney to pa y m y traveling ex- God bless him and here I may be very sure of that,\ matron, brusquely. \Doc­ tor Clarimont ain't one t o neglect poor people because* they are poor.\ Tha t cv en ing, Aun t Jo, frying crullers over th o kitchen -fire, was surprised by a visit from he r niece, who came in all wrapped in furs, with her cheeks crimsoned with th e frosty winter air. Bless mo _! this ain't never yo u r \ said'Aunt Jo , ''peering over the~ rinis of he r spectacles. I drove over t o see you, Aun t Jo, \ said Mary, \t o toll yo u thaVt you were right. Th e metal was counter­ feit.\ Eli !\ said Aun t Jo , mechanically ladling out tho brown, curley crullers, although sho did not look a t wha t sho was doing. I have writton to Harr y Marlow, canceling our engagement,\ said Doctor Mary, calmly, albeit he r voice faltered a little. \-The ma n wh o will heartlessly let his old mother g o to an almshouse, sooner than take the trouble to maintain her, can b e no fit husband for any woman !\ And then she sat down b y the fire, and told Aun t Jo everything; for crabbed crusty old Aun t Jo ha d been lfko a mother t o her, and th e girl's heart was full t o overflowing. VV hen she ha d ceased speaking, Aun t J o nodded her head. \You have done well and wisely she said. Old Mrs- Marlow died tha t winter, in Aldenbury Almshouse, with her head on Doctor Mary Clarimont's arm, and never knew tha t her gar­ rulous confession had deprived her son of his promised wife. And Mary says, quietly and res­ olutely, tha t her profession must b e husband and home to her henceforth \Jus t what it ought t o be, \ says Aun t Jo. \ISTo woman ever ye t suc­ ceeded in doing tw o things a t once.\ A. Man who had Honey. Clarimont ha d listened qui- th e garrulous t ale, bu t th e had \ varied in he r cheek |than once as she stood there, your son's name Harr y Mar- she said, slowly and thought- Eastern people do no t appreciate the scale upon which Calif or ni an s lay out their work. If they could soe a few of th e fifty thousand or one hundred thousand acre ranches and note th e manner in which work is carried on upon them, they would be better posted. A case in point is tha t of an eastern merchant wh o wrote to a Los Angeles County bee man for a sample of hi s extracted honey- Hi s request was complied with, and th e merchant was so wel pleased with th e uppearance and good quality of th e honey tha t h e sent an order for all the bee man had like that . Th e gentleman, thinking th e merchent migh t not\ b e reckon­ ing on what he had in stock, wrote him tha t h e had sixteen tons on hand, but tha t h e might ast well mak e ic twenty tons, which would b e jus t tw o carloads, and tha t h e would ship it,immediately. H e wa s no t very much surprised a few day s after t o receive a telegram telling him ; \Kee p your honey, I only wan t a case o r two . JCo* ^LnffeZc* ITZmee, old |ef», miss, a t your service,\ said woman, with a duck of he r tej-capped head, which was meant dut y in place of th e impossible eay - lie like this asked. Docto r Sandwich Islnnds. Get gold if yon can, but beware of guilt. This world belongs getic, says Emerson- Tho best railway for Tho Pnio n Pacifio. <^ When is a soldier like a oarpentei? Whe n ho is going t o drill. To bo sure of good weight g o t o tlio barber shop Saturday night. When a pretty Irish girl is stolen away they suspect some boycotter. Pritz has named his do g Non Se- qnitur, because ho does not follow. Wh y is there nothing like leather? Because it is th e sole support of man. Tlio man who feel certain tha t h e will not succeed is seldom mistaken. Love laughs a t locksmiths, bu t it hns a perfect respect for the plumber. Money in th o hands of a spend­ thrift is like a sword in the hands of a fool. An Illinois paper called a young man a masher and now lias a libel suit on hand . As any man may be compelled t o eat his words he should never indulge in bitter speeches. Clara Louise Kellogg will not sing any more after she is married. I t is said she will lecture. Lyinc; in llie suu is said to be good for a sore back; bn t a sore back is good for lying in the son. Much of th e talk about th e great quantity of whisky in Kentucky is mere matter of moonshine. The good tha t men do may b e in­ terred with their bones, bu t th o cof­ fins of some men are not crowded- Kind-hearted editors now allow contributiors t o th e waste-paper bas­ ket t o write on both sides of th e pa­ per. A man's nature runs either t o herbs or weedsi therefore, let him. reason­ ably water th e one and destroy th e other. Two marriage notices in a recent number of a Philadelphia paper were headed \Birch-Twiggs\ and \Price- Given.\ Th e Tribune says tha t a base ball club has been organized in Denver, but tha t in other respects th e city is prospering. \What is tha t man yelling at?\ inquired Tom my of his younger brother. \At tho to p of his voice,\ replied the littlo one . \ I like t o hear a baby cry, \ said a crusty old bachelor. \Why?\ \Be­ cause then th e littlo nnisanco is tak­ en out of th e room.\ Some one who has been there re­ marks tha t a young author lives in an attic because one is rarely able t o live on his first story. * Economy begios a t home, \ mut­ tered old Slobaon as he bought a box f fifteen cent cigars for himself and a dollar pair of shoes for his wife. Copy of a notice on th e beach at Brighton: \In case of ladies in danger of drowning, they should be seized by th e clothing and not by th e ir, which generally comes off. The chap who sent us a poem be­ ginning \ When twilight dews ar e falling fast upon the rosy lea,\ haa since married Rosa Lee, and now the weekly dues are falling fast on him. A/ California paper regards th e harmless and useful umbrella as \ a moral and physical blight upon hu­ manity,\ and declares tha t \ it cre­ ates an irresistible tendency t o klep­ tomania.\ Mistress (horrified)-—\G ood gra­ cious, Bridget, have you been using one of my stockings to strain th e cof­ fee through? \ Bridget (apologetic­ ally) \Yes mum ; bu t shure I dinn't take a clane one!\ Th e crying want of this country seems t o b e a gun o r a pistol tha t will exercise reason in th e matte r of going off. It is plain tha t th e aver­ age bearer of these weapons not possess th e reason necessary regulate then . Some one says: Bread an d butte r is th e dress of this world; love and kindness it s trimming. 7 ' We'l l be t &400 th e ma n who wrote 'that isn't married. An y married ma n knows tha t the trimmings al^fi^ays cost four \ Th e Ne w Orleans J ^'coyttTie notes tha t yellow dogs follow in th e wake of th e stir*flower craze. \Abou t a doz­ en yellow dogs in a n »»thetio parlor migh t breaic n p th e whole bn«ne«i bu t ther e is n o telling- times as much as th e dress. A Scotch preacher, who found his congregation going t o sleep one Sun­ da y before h e had fairly begun, sud­ denly stopped and exclaimed ; *'Breth­ ren, it's na fair. Wait till I ge t alang ; and then if I'm na worth listning to , gav g to* sleep; bu t dinna gan d be ­ fore I ge t commenced. *' Gie a mon. 1 a chance. Coal has boon discovered a t Perry , Y. Th e timber cut, generally, is short for 1 S82. Utica is to HAvc the next state f^ii\ in September. The tax. on whiskey arid tobacco is to bo left as i t is. Peach crops in tho eastern part of the state reported killed. A whale 40 feet long was captured off Long Island, last week. The toll sheet, for tho canals, is tho same for 1882 as for 1881. Edwar d Stokes, Pink's murderer, keeps a gay saloon in 3STew York. ^^Ex-president Hayes is now presi­ dent of a bank a t Fremont , Ohio. St. Patrick's Da y 1 7th inst. wa s gen tie rally observed in tho larger places. Over two tons of potatoes a week are brought from Europe t o ou r shores. Crops looking good according t o the statistics of the agricultural de­ partment. Striking among railroad men seems to be fashionable; bu t it is gettin g a little stale. , \Billy th e Kid \ th e Albany »' es­ caped jail bird, has been taken a t Minneapolis, Minn Rent s have ndvnuced 15 por cent in Ne w York City, and have advanc­ ed throughout th e state. Eigh t millions is asked of congress, to remedy th e navigation of th e Mis­ souri River t o Sioux City. Th e St. Jame s Episcopal Church of Long Branch will erect a memo­ rial window for Gen. Garfield. Martin Flannigan, th e Buffalo murderer, has had his sentence com­ muted, to imprisonment for life. Judg e Blatchford has received an d accepted th e appointment of associ­ ate judge, refused by Conkling. etTttons ar e 'being' signed^ 'all^veir \ th e states, for th e benefit of Mason > the man who did not kill Gniteau! E . L . Adams , of th e Rochester JDem ocrat an d CVironicZe, succeeds Mr. Fairman on th e Klmira ^Lcl\ver- tS-oer. The southern floods ar e diminish­ ing; grea t damage ha s been done, and relief is being sent from ©very- state. Alvord has introduced a bill t o re-* servo a public forest in th e Adiron- dacks tha t shall b e free t o all for a hunt ! Sergeant Mason's family will -be cared for by private subscription even if th e hard sentence is not miti­ gated . _ Navigation has opened on the up ­ per as well \as moat of th o lakes; it is fully tw o weeks \han usual. Now telegraphy is improved so that any person who can writo upon a type-writer can by tha t instrument send messages. Y Guiteau seems t o think not hang! He is perfectly tha t be has cut a figure in even if lie is hanged! Charley \W right, who saved th ree lives a t the Par k Row fire, ha s re­ ceived a medal and quite a sum of money for his bravery . D r. Gray, of th e State Asylum a t Utica, was shot through th e cheek by i*. lunatic not a member of th e in- Hiitation. JSJrvrro w escape - Th e president lias approved «»f th e act tha t enables th e Postmanter-Gen - era I to adjust claims of postmaicters for looses by fire, burglary, etc . L>«»wn in Mi^si -tKippi th e legislature are considering a bill tha t -prohibits* the Hale of tobacco to minor** without consent from parents or guardians. Another comet has been found in Hercules by an assistant of Dudley Observatory; -it has a tail five rniu- utes long an d a nucleus of about th e eight magnitude. Ilejnry W . LongfeJIow, the poet, died in Boston Friday , March 24, af­ ter a lingering ilness. * H e suffered from a complication of ailments, th e chief being peritonitis. A drunken man in Wisconsin dis­ turbed a Lutheran meeting, where­ upon th e minister coolly walked down from his platform an d threw the offender out of doors a justifia­ ble and commendable act ! A man and woman wer e brough t into a Brooklyn police court, bot h having been taken t o th o station, house during th e nigh t before, an d they there recognized each other* as man and wife. H e left Cork, Ireland, . fifteen years before, t o provide as home fo r her, an d ha d .failed^ t o dot so.. The y went away happy . ^ , inland earlier 1 lie will sal ii-fi«*d historv , doew to

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